i dont know why but i cant stand waking up every morning, getting ready, and going to school. Every morning i find myself in my moms room saying "dont make me go to school please."
It doesn't work...go figure. There is no "special someone" that i love to see there. Thats at church :) hahaha
I dont really mind school, i love my friends, i love my teachers, i love the campus, and it is a pretty good environment.
I just hate having to get up and get ready for the same thing every day. School is nothing special. I never learn anything terrific. My friends are amazing dont get me wrong. But it just feels so empty and pointless. When im at church i feel like im growing as a person, spiritually, and socialy.
At school im around friends that dont share my same faith, therefore i cant really talk to them the way i can talk to my chirch friends, my church friends can relate God to all my problems. That is amazing because God is usually the reason i am having problems, because im not going to him in the hard times, and my church friends can help me with that. My school friends can just tell me to get a boyfriend "that will help" they say.
It doesnt. A boyfriend only makes it worse.
So my friends are not helping with making me like school more.
I never learn anything that i feel will help me wiht my future.
At church i learn how to apply God to my life. That is the most important thing to me. To bad school does not offer this to me.
The enviroment of school is...well its public school.
Church is...well its church.
I dont hang out with bad people at school or do bad trhings at school, I just dont do the same things i do at church.
I am finding this to be very hard for me.
To me truthful i really miss Stoneybrooke. I never thought in a million years i would say that. I dont want to go back! NO! but i dont want to stay were i am either. Im going to stay were i am. But it is a struggle. And its a struggle that i dont feel like i have the enery to deal with :/
I have been chatting to God about this. He does not really seem to have anything to say to me about it. So im going to hang in there and hope that God has a plan for me ther. Who knows maybe i will help change someones life :)
love, maddie
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I've been here before. A little confused. A little unsure. Curious as to what God is doing with the place that he has me! I think that you are getting a really awesome opportunity to learn how to minister and to act around people that have different world views than you do. I kind of feel this way in a lot of places that I've been put in. The first being my family and second where I work. It's really difficult to be around people that you can't talk about God with, or that don't share your same passion for Jesus. I can say that it is a blessing and it is so good for developing your faith (which I'm sure you know). You've been given the opportunity to shine like Jesus and to be a vessel of love.
ReplyDeleteI'm going to pray for you in these two ways:
Lord I ask that Maddie will be a vessel through which Your Love can flow to others.
Romans 5:1-5 tells us "Therefore, since we have been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. Through him we have also obtained access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and we rejoice in hope of the glory of God. More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.
AND Lord I ask that you would give Maddie a thankful heart, especially in these times of difficulty.
Ephesians 5:19-20 "addressing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody to the Lord with your heart, giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ!"
Love you Mad! I think that you are great and I know that God has placed you where you are for a specific reason that you might not see now, but will at some point!
Romans 8:28